SELF-LOVE, FIRST & FOREMOST
I’m not usually one for Valentine’s Day, I’ve never really been. But this year I’ll be the one knocking down glasses of champagne with a very special date: myself.
I know I’ve only been a mother for 5mns, but my life has changed in ways I haven’t been able to comprehend just yet. Someone asked me this morning what it felt like to be a mother, at that stage she could have handed me a pen and paper and given me 4 hours to dissert. The lack of sleep, the flow of hormones, and the soreness of both your mind and body will have you quite confused; throw society’s expectations on top and you have no idea what’s what.
So this Valentine’s Day I’m taking myself on a date, in the comfort of my own home, my zone. Last year I surrendered the ownership of my body to a growing foetus. I watched it as it beautifully expanded and adjusted to Hugo’s presence and needs, I watched it grow and birth my gorgeous son.
It was beautiful, but it also was draining and very painful. And just when I thought I could claim my ownership back, I became someone’s mother, on top of being someone’s wife. I absolutely love my boys, more than I’ll ever love myself, so like many women I can easily lose track of myself, and my feelings.
Motherhood might have just started for me, but it’s hopefully for the rest of my life. So, I don’t think that I’m too early when deciding to have a check-up with myself, to probe my heart and mind to face these feelings I haven’t given myself the time to check on since I peed on that stick almost a year ago.
Self-love, first and foremost. Always. Cause I’ll never be good at loving my family if I don’t love and respect myself.
Today is an ode to myself, I’ll poor myself glasses of champagne, I’ll file and paint the nails post-partum dried the life out, I’ll play my favourite tunes loud in the house (thinking Private Party by India Arie to kick off the festivities), I’ll stay in my PJs or will try on my favourite dresses and will twirl around the house. I’ll sit in front of the mirror and will genuinely ask myself “How are you my love?”, I’ll also ask myself this question I couldn’t answer earlier “How does it feel to be a mother?”. And I’ll keep on chatting to myself, I’ll sing, I’ll cry if I want to, I’ll dance.
And I’ll vow to make a tradition of it, to have a “me night” at least once a month, where my Freddies get to hang. A new Freddie, the mother, has joined the forever growing plethora of characters that make me, and we haven’t had her welcoming party yet.
Here’s to her!
When was your last “me-night”? Do you have them often enough; do you have them at all? Let’s chat in the comment section on Instagram or on here!
In the meantime, I’m raising a toast to all of us women. May we always respect and love ourselves abundantly.
Credit photos: Nicole Hertel
Pyjamas | ASOS
White dress | Edit the brand
Sleeping mask | Holistic Silk
Faux fur coat | old ASOS
Blush dress | old ASOS – similar here